"Treat others the way you want to be treated"
In my childhood, that was how to be "nice" and for the most part, it really works. We all want to be respected, we all want to feel appreciated, we all want to be treated nicely...right? Yes, generally, but also I believe it is much deeper than that. The Golden Rule comes from the view that we all operate under the same perspective. It is assumed that my version of "being nice" is the same as your version of "being nice.;" that there is this "common sense" understanding of respectful behavior. This works if you live and only associate with people that grew up in your small part of our vast world. Because you all have similar experiences, you all share the same perspective/view of behavior, expectations, cultural mores & taboos.
Just as many of you, I grew up only experiencing other cultures through an outdated World Book Encyclopedia, National Geographic magazine, and basic sitcom shows on television (that still pretty much matched my own white, middle class, Christian background). Today, we can talk to anyone across the world in a manner of seconds. My own children have friends from all over the world through gaming and social media that they communicate with regularly. This is where the "golden rule" starts to unravel. Choosing to still continue to only see the world from our perspective and treat others as we want to be treated causes unnecessary misunderstandings; damaging friendships, work partnerships, and more. We need to do better; we need to first understand that there are many ways to show respect. We need to be willing to step out from behind our perspective and see someone else's point of view. We also need to accept that we can both be "right;" no one right and wrong way to show respect.
Just as many of you, I grew up only experiencing other cultures through an outdated World Book Encyclopedia, National Geographic magazine, and basic sitcom shows on television (that still pretty much matched my own white, middle class, Christian background). Today, we can talk to anyone across the world in a manner of seconds. My own children have friends from all over the world through gaming and social media that they communicate with regularly. This is where the "golden rule" starts to unravel. Choosing to still continue to only see the world from our perspective and treat others as we want to be treated causes unnecessary misunderstandings; damaging friendships, work partnerships, and more. We need to do better; we need to first understand that there are many ways to show respect. We need to be willing to step out from behind our perspective and see someone else's point of view. We also need to accept that we can both be "right;" no one right and wrong way to show respect.
I propose that we can create a better "rule" out there and in my classroom many years ago, I called it the Platinum Rule...
"Treat others as they want to be treated"I can understand that my male Muslim friend chooses to not physically touch me to show he respects me. So, we don't shake hands when I visit him and kind hello is all I need to introduce him to others. I have also seen him shake hands with someone when he sees that they do not know his religious expectations of himself. We both are choosing to live by the Platinum Rule and comfortably see the world through other's eyes, knowing that it does not diminish our own. We see that life is a "give and take" as we walk through this world and adjust to respect the people and perspectives we come in contact with on a daily basis.